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Friday, September 08, 2006

_*Missing You*_

Pulau Tekong on the 7th September 2006
A Journey which leaves a loved one's heart feeling the agony of separation
It may all be just two weeks
But time has now taken into a different demension
Where a second may take too long to pass; a minute that always seems to forever last
The person whom I so love in my life
Has gone to a far away place divided by the borders of restricted waters
Life came to a halt when we bid our goodbyes
The softness in our tones expressed the sadness somehow
A sudden realization that I've lost all energy to embrace him
If I held on any much longer; it would be even harder for me to let go
Trust myself to hide my genuine feelings
But I know making a false front that it didn't all matter was tearing me apart
Lying to myself didn't work this time, it's all aching in my heart to see him go

The wait of 2 weeks from now
The wait of 2 years from now
The wait of an assurance
The wait of a walk down the aisle of happiness
'wait' takes up almost half our lifetime but there's something in us that's worth waiting for...
The wait for someone whom you know you'll find life's true happiness

I took the last ferry with heartfelt worries
Will he sleep the night through comfortably...
Will he feel homesick...
Will he get by this two weeks with sufficient rest...
Will he have enough to eat...
Will he be bullied...
I know my worries are unfounded but this is someone whom I love with all my heart
I would want him to have the best in life
I put it all off with a smile for I know there'a a part of him that will enjoy this pride and honour given to him to serve the country

I boarded the bus with a heavy heart as I took a last glance of the ferry that disappeared into the waves and far away
My watch showed 6.50pm and I soon began to miss him
I went into flashbacks of how we met and got together in the end
He was someone who shared every part of my similarities
There was so much connectivity we had that has got us so closely attached
*The entire bus had this atmosphere where you knew everyone shared the same feeling as you did

" No matter how good the food may taste today; it would have been tasteless anyway"

How right can this person be...? He was right apparently; for I totally had no appetite to indulge myself with the food that was served today, although it may be sirlion steak with french fries...it looked like crap because I never wanted to taste a meal that would be the last till 2 weeks later~

My entire journey soon after was a total torture
Every minute I would hear the word 'Calvin'
Left and right the word echoed through my ears
and my separtion axiety grew stronger
All I wanted to do was to go home and read my long awaited email from my precious
I suppose they knew I wasn't in the mood to eat during dinner time at Tekong
Concerns were shown that I was to be hungry and I was dragged to have something to eat
I appreciated the thoughtfulness in them but my tummy seemd to have this weird feeling
I didn't want them to worry so I had 'kway teow' soup which I didn't even know why I ordered that
I couldn't forced myself anymore and I left 6 fishballs and merely gave an excuse that I was already full
She knew that wasn't my true reason... but it didn't matter to me anymore...I have grown weary of wearing a false front
She was such a dear and gave me a call to see how I was
This two folks I have grown to love and enjoy spending time with
They act as if I was their daughter and I truly treasured this very endearment in them

The knowlegement of 'Uncle' & 'Aunty' faded today
All I heard today was 'Daddy' & 'Mummy' instead
They too wanted the best for me and I was offered an opportunity
to work together with them for their fashion industry
I was promised personal nuturing and guidence from them
A 'sign' of acceptance was flashed to me
I was happy within but the future was untelling
I'm now left in dire straits for an assurance I know I will never be given

Dear Olufsen
This has got to be the longest word of truthness I have decided to post
"I read your email Da and I promise wholeheartedly that I'd be waiting no matter how long it takes"
Have me in your arms again this coming 21st September and you'll know how much I truly love you...absence does makes the heart grow founder.

Right Here Waiting...Ye|Lin

~*In the girls room*~ @ Friday, September 08, 2006

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